Sore Town

Sore Town

I hit my head yesterday while boarding at Sunrise and I think it jiggled my brain around a little too much in the process because I just microwaved my cereal. Last night should have been the first clue that I had a mild concussion when, even after swallowing a nice little concoction of Tylenol, Aleive and Excedrins, my head was still constantly throbbing in excruciating pain. It felt like someone used my head as a wrecking ball in demolishing the solid concrete walls of a steel vault factory.

And what's odd is, I thought everything was good. I mean, we followed proper protocol of checking for head injury after severe pwnage by mountain. My dad examined my pupils and interrogated me. He asked what my plate number was, which I definitely don't know- even on a good day; and he asked when I arrived in Arizona, which he doesn't even know. But that's ok, A for effort Dad! So he decided I was fine and I concurred. And later I even did some research on Wikipedia which is basically like, 99% fact. I didn't find out anything about concussions but I did discover that if you make a fist with your hand, your heart is about that size. And a whale's heart is roughly 400 times that size.

So then I'm lying in bed at 2 AM, thinking about the day and trying to decipher between reality and my strange made-up hallucinations. We drove out to Sunrise and shredded up the slopes- that was real. Then we hit up the park and I went over a 20 foot ramp an pulled a huge switch frontside rodeo 540; that was definitely real. And then there was a dumb fat kid on his dumb fat skis that crashed into me, resulting in my head hitting the ground extremely hard. Pretty sure that was real. Then we saw the pigs wandering around in the parking lot. And they didn't even look like pigs, more of a werewolf/pig. So, there were the werepigs. And then santa robbed a bank and got killed? And he was also a leprechaun? Really?

I finally fell asleep because all the thinking was making my brain hurt too much. My poor, swollen, bruised brain. But YAY... I woke up this morning! And thats a good thing because apparently if you have a concussion and fall asleep you could die and never wake up. Or something. So I must be okay after all. Theres just this reeaaally really intense headache and it hurts to sneeze, cough, laugh, shoulder check, itch my back, brush my teeth, make a sandwich, put my hair in a pony tail, reach for anything over waist-height, move, talk and breathe. Also I have a much stronger hate-on for skiers now. 

Oh ya, and I love how chairlift conversations always go with skiers. Like, they've never met you and 2 seconds into the conversation they already hate you and every generation of your entire family.

Me: Wow this is super great weather today, huh?

Cool Ski Dude: Yep, not bad. How long you been snow-boarding for?

Me: For about like 10 years- My whole family is here, we all board together. Even my mom and dad who are old.

Cool Ski Dude: Oh ya? Well i've been skiing since I was in my mother's fetus and I can do every trick known to man.

Me: Ummm, neat-o there ski dude!

Not-So Cool Ski Dude Anymore: YAA I'm super fast and amazing and I can ride down a black diamond at 30 mph! Also I love neon lycra! AAHH!

Me: Cool.

Ski Dude: I WILL CUT YOUR THROAT!

Anyways, I cant remember much of the last couple days but here's some photos. Apparently I was at this place with these people. And It may or may not have been fun.

Video made by Jeff Borys of the whole fam doin our thang. And I must warn you- HOLY we look like olympians out there LOL! (I recommend you pause the Playlist music before playing it)

Apparently this guy was also there. I don't even need to ask him to know that he had an awesome time.

And it turns out the werepigs were real because I took pictures so there's proof. Looking back, I'm not sure why we didn't get out and ride them, or at the least chase them down. MINUS 10 POINTS FOR ME!


Am I not right?? WEREPIG!

And the leprechaun/santa bank robbery story, also true. I googled it and there it was.
'Leprechaun & Santa Dead, No More Presents or Gold for Anyone LOLZ'